so yeah, it’s been a while
and i’m sorry but i can explain!!
you see – when they told me college (especially with a residential program like yale-nus’s) was an immersive experience i never really believed them till i realized i was getting in over my head for real
maybe it’s just this period where i’m super swamped but i’m getting my work piled up because i have no energy or focus to do it ever and i’m getting back slightly shittier grades and the fifth wall showcase is this saturday and i have to settle music for little shop and little shop showtime’s in three weeks and we have a tonne to get done before then and i have to find time for friends (both within and outside of yale-nus) and i have to find time for family and i have to find time for patrick (not that it’s ever anything but happily and willingly given) and i don’t even have much time to sit and breathe and i can feel myself begin to collapse but i just keep trying to magnify the tiny voice in my heart yelling you!! can!! do!! it!! because once that’s gone all my hope will die with it and yes i am being melodramatic but i am exhausted both physically and mentally and i honestly don’t know how to recharge and let myself recover at this point because everything is just non-stop
and i guess the worst part is everyone seems to be handling things/life/themselves well enough and i don’t want to be the only idiot falling apart alone 😦
please, god, help me // i promise i’ll try harder and be a better person if you help keep me from going under this time
keep yr head up kiddos we got this!!!!
if love is built, not found
it all comes back around
then you can make a home out of me
choices // charlie lim